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One move to America, one surprise pregnancy and a lot of fun later.

Thursday, October 28, 2010

Signed off by the Doctor

Well I have had my six week check up with my OB/GYN and I saw Doctor Osmun the Doctor that delivered Hannah and saved me! All is well and everything has healed up nicely, or so he says, I can't see myself!!! The funniest part was when he started contraception and if we were going to have another baby. After I had picked myself up off the floor from laughing hysterically we agreed that never would be a good time to go through all that again. He has a good sense of humour as well and makes the whole "poking" around bearable. Hannah was with me and it was a nice moment seeing her staring at the man who delivered her and the first face she encountered in this world. I then moved back into the waiting room and fed Hannah and while I was doing that I bumped into a girl that was at our Prenatal classes. We had a lovely chat and she had a baby girl as well who was a big 9 lbs as well. I forgot to give her my phone number before I left which is a shame as we got on quite well in the 20 minutes we were chatting and it would have been nice to have a play date with her.
Anyway back to contraception. It is not something I have had to give a lot of thought to in the last 18 years ( or so I believed) so the options are all a bit scary. They are also limited by the fact that I am breast feeding. Any advice is appreciated and if you are shy, please do give me it by private message or email.

What else is happening? Well we have moved house. Hannah is thriving and is really tall and big already. We are all off to Boston this weekend for a wedding. It will be Hannahs first ever flight and I am quite nervous about it as I always hated screaming babies on planes. Lets hope she is well behaved. If she screams I will just have to pop out my Booby and latch her on, that usually works!

Well will report how it all goes after the weekend.

I am trying to organise some time away from Hannah at the moment. All my RISI pals are following this. So hopefully I will have a dinner out with Vicky next week for a couple of hours and then a girls Spa day at the Elizabeth Arden spa next Sunday while Jarlath and my Mother in law watch Hannah. Having the two of them there to look after her makes me at ease as there is back up if anything happens, which I am sure it won't.

Well rambled on long enough for now. love to all. Xx

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Confidence being sucked out with the breast milk

How is it that one can help run a multinational company and be responsible for hundreds of staff and be completely in control and confident but confront me with one 9 pound baby and all confidence and ability seems to fly out the window.

I am used to being in control - and I am sure you will find several members of my old staff that would call me controlling - no comment from Fay Johnston please!! Give me a new born baby and suddenly I am Mrs insecurity who cannot make a decision or statement with any confidence. I am lucky in that Hannah is a content baby who is regularly sleeping through the night already but I still have this insecurity over everything to do with her. Jarlath will tell you how much it is driving him mad as he is used to me being more decisive and confident.

I guess it is like any new skill or job where you have the bedding in period where you are not sure what you are doing. I can't imagine how I would feel if I had a fussy or colicky baby as I would probably just break down completely if that were the case.

I hope this is a natural feeling for all first time Mums and that it will go away over time. I am looking forward to our house move in a couple of weeks as I plan to join some local Mother and baby groups in our new area - I haven't bothered where we live at the moment because I am just about to move away. I hope this interaction with other Mums will take away a lot of my own anxiety and help to make new friends in the same position as myself.

Generally life is good and baby is doing well but I just wish I could shake these feelings of insecurity.

On the plus side Hannah got the all clear on a suspected hip problem from the Orthapedic surgeon today. We are also getting a visit from Grandma (my mother in law) in November, which I am really looking forward to as it is important to me that Hannah gets to know her one remaining Grandma. I don't have any family that will come and visit so it is very special to me the support I am receiving from my sister in law Alison and the visits we will get from other members of Jarlaths family.

Sorry the blog is a bit short and a bit negative but just trying to adjust to all these new emotions in my new role.

H Xx